I have fed birds, squirrels, rabbits, and any other small creatures that happened into my path for years. Seed-filled bird feeders are my favorite. Anyone who loves to feed birds might as well love to feed squirrels too. It is a simple fact of life. Birdfeeder + Seeds = Squirrels.
I had tried the usual ways to keep the squirrels away with not much success, so basically I stopped trying. I kept the bird seed inside for obvious reasons. One day I was on my way out and noticed the bird feeder was empty. I went inside for the bag of seed and filled the feeder. I was running late as usual and had already locked the door, so I put the extra seed in a cooler that was on the carport.
When I returned, the crackling of my wheels on the gravel caused an eruption. The explosion covered my entire carport instantly with squirrels, bird seed, and styrofoam. A cooler full of crazy had been released at maximum warp speed in every direction imaginable. The largest piece of the cooler that remained was about the size of a yard rock. There were lots of seed hulls but not too many seeds remaining.
I was unable to catch all of the styrofoam snowflakes that were everywhere. I did the best I could to clean up the area. When my room mate returned. I explained the situation. I told him I could not understand what happened. I had put the sealed bag of seed in the cooler and covered it so they could not see it. He just started laughing insanely. “You put a bag of bird seed in a styrofoam cooler because they couldn’t see it.” He was almost crying by now. “They bury seeds and nuts in the ground and go back to find them. They don’t have to see anything!” He just looked back across the carport and said, “They couldn’t see it!” He laughed every time he saw one of the styrofoam snowflakes for weeks until they all faded away.
Most of the time I think of myself as being fairly smart. But there is nothing like a cooler full of crazy to make you realize that thinking you are smart doesn’t stop anything.
Cooler Full of Crazy was a guest post for Guest in Jest. To check out this post and other great posts at Maine Paper Pusher’s Guest in Jest site: